Stupid Things People Say And Do
August 2, 2009
Is it just me or are humans some of the most stupid, annoying, idiotic creatures of the planet? Now, I’m not referring to things like the fact we’re using up all the oil, we have with war with ourselves and so on. I mean stupid little things that people say or do. For example, the image above. Not only is the woman or the person who took the photo stupid, but the person who spent time adding the word “Fail” and then uploaded it to the internet under the false presumption that any part of the process mentioned above would be humorous to someone other than themselves (other than the fact that the people involved are so pitiful I have to laugh… Like when my friend swung his £1000 Fender round his neck and it fell onto the ground. I didn’t want to laugh but I couldn’t resist). Regardless, I am writing in this post about people say and do things like…
1. “The Sun’s in my eyes”
Is it now? Is it now!? THEN WHY AREN’T YOU SCREAMING IN AGONY!? If the sun was literally INSIDE your eyes, I think you’d be doing a little more than making some stupid remark about it. Unless you’re friggin’ Cyclops from the X-Men, the sun is not in your eyes.
2. “It’s raining buckets out there!”
Is it!? Is it REALLY raining buckets? Like, literally buckets? So buckets are falling from the sky? I DIDN’T THINK SO. It’s like people who say it’s raining cats and dogs. It’s not. At least buckets are actually at least water-related (unless you’re filling them with sand, concrete or milk), whereas cats and dogs aren’t… although, I guess the fact that their bodies being made of the stuff makes them vaguely eligible… although probably not. Seriously, though. It’s not raining any of these things; it’s raining water. Didn’t they teach you anything in school? No, because you went to public school.
3. “I’m starving to death”
So you’re saying that you’ve not eaten in so long that your body is SO deprived of nutrients that you’re about to die? Really? Because you look pretty bloommin’ healthy to me! Try talking to someone in the 3rd world about starving and then see if you really ARE starving to death. Sure, you’re hungry, but people who are starving to death didn’t eat a cheeseburger a couple of hours ago, did they?
4. “I can’t wait for the nice weather”, yet complain when it’s too hot.
This IS nice, isn’t it? Or at least that’s what you say when it’s raining. WHAT THE HELL? Make your mind up. Either it’s nice like this, or it’s nice when it’s not like this. What else do you want!? If you don’t like the weather, why not move to the Moon, where there is no atmosphere. No, I didn’t think so. I didn’t think you’d be able to cope without oxygen… You’re pathetic.
5. That stupid “I can’t be arsed to run” run that people do, making them look like they’ve pooed themselves. (ie. “Wunning”— Walk-Running)
Ok, I gather that you’re not running properly in order to spare yourself the embarrassment of running, but seriously, you’re just embarrassing yourself more by half-running than by actually running. At least if you run, no matter how poorly you run, you’ll look like someone who’s trying to get out of the way of an oncoming vehicle and not someone who’s running to the nearest toilet.
6. “What just happened?” when watching Television
Ok. Not only did you miss the show by doing something distracting (which was probably distracting to me, too), you have the cheek to disturb me (and yourself) even further by asking what happened, and then asking me to explain in detail what just happened. If you actually watched the show then maybe you’d be able to pick it up again. You may not be a friggin’ genius (evidently) but you certainly have enough brain power to follow the plot of your dumbed-down television tripe.
Ok, so that’s all I’ve got. Got any you want to add? Feel free to share in the comments!
Comments
5 Responses
Leave a reply
Advertisements
Does that really bother you that much?
How do you wun?
As the woman in question, I’d like to point out that the entire reason that photo exists is because it was done as part of a Flickr Group Roulette challenge to deliberately create a stupid LOLcat/FAIL genre image. The stupidity of it was actually the whole point. Given how much attention this photo has garnered in the year since it was taken, I’d say it was actually pretty successful at capturing the stupid.
@pants Haha, yes. For what it’s worth, I was being overly harsh to style my post on that of popular satirists who are almost poetically harsh about the subject they are talking about. The image itself isn’t actually that bad and, while I didn’t laugh out loud, I did find it amusing enough to use it to compliment the blog post. I’ve made “Fail” pictures of my own before, so it’s rather hypocritical to mock someone else for creating them too.
I apologise if I offended you at all; You certainly succeeded in capturing your image’s intended purpose.
Naw, ‘salright. I don’t actually disagree with you; people are basically stupid.
Not really, but I pretend it does.
And you basically squat a bit and run with your knees leading you. It’s stupid.